Video game Anecdote: "What the hell is it about me and handguns!?"
I was playing yet another thrilling game of Battlefield 2, when i realized something. Over half of my game was spent using my sidearm instead of my standard issued automatic weapon. This made me think about how my play style has basically centered around handguns and other semi-auto weapons ever since i started playing FPS's.
*flashback waver*
Doom (PC): Oh sure, the chain gun rocked, the BFG9000 kicked major ass (i mean come on! Its called the Big Fucking Gun 9000!), and the rocket launcher made wonderful gibs.....but nothing really mamade me feel like I was punching it out on em like the ole 'Pistole'. That pop pop sound that I'd get every time I pulled the trigger sent little shivers of glee down my spine! (though the shotgun was the favored gun of choice through the entire game, pretty much a standard room sweeper anyhow).
Half-life (PC): Probably THE first game to feature a Glock instead of the standard Beretta (or in the case of WWII games) the 1911. It showed the world the wonder of a gun that can fire underwater, and is much more dependable at killing a "zombie" than crowbar to the head. When I found the Glock on the dead security guard, I suddenly felt MUCH better.
Half-life Counterstrike (PC): Screw being a sniper or an SMG whore, DE all the way! That's Desert Eagle to the unknowing, and uninitiated. El .50 caliber pistole ends the life of the enemy like a Catholic school girl's virginity is ended at a college frat party; violated and very messy.......
Deus Ex (PC): My name is JC Denton.....they call me "Silent Killer". There were many ways to play this game (which was one of the greatest things about it), but of all the ways, i liked vamping up my ole Stealth pistol and popping some headshots through a modified scope.
Most guides I've read say that the stealth pistol isn't really worth the effort, but in all honesty by packing it on with some skills, a bunch of mods, and a steady aim, that little package had some killin power to it!
Almost none of the other weapons allowed a distanced silent takedown (meaning you can kill without alertin patrols, the BEST way to stay alive in that game), and since 10mm ammunition was cheap and plentiful, you'd never run out of ammo! And i DO mean never! I once tried to go dry on a killing spree....random gunnings a whatnot...... and got tired after the first 30 minutes or so.
The stealth pistol's 1 inventory space ensured that i could pack up on some LAM's or other neat goodies without reserve too. Which allowed me to roleplay my character to it's fullest. I personally liked to keep a lot of booze handy, because them strippers started looking mighty fine in my wavering alcohol soaked haze.
Medal of Honor Allied Assault (PC): F3AR MY PISTOL WHIP!!!!! If the pistol came out, the enemy'd start tossing nades...apparently they preferred blowing themselves up instead of getting smacked around BITCH style.
*evil cackle*
I swear my kill count would have been better if those wimps didn't take out their entire team on some occasions! Damn TK'ers stealing the kills from me!
Unreal Tournament (original PC): Dual Enforcers kick ass! gotta love that rush when you see that second Enforcer come up on the screen....OOOOOWEEEEEEEEE!!
UT2004 (PC): They left em out!! curses to em!!! MY PRECIOUS!!!!!
Red Faction (PS2): Pissed the hell out of a lot of buds about this little known gem secret i used VERY successfully in ALL of the games I've played. Almost all the weapons were notoriously inaccurate (as in only 1 out of every 20 bullets would actually hit the center of your aiming reticule). The little trick i found was that with ANY pistol, you could shoot using single taps with short pauses between shots to hit dead center EVERY time.
While my buddies were trying to mow me down with the woefully inaccurate SMG's, i was plinking them off like tin cans on a fence. Most of the games played out like a Stormtrooper shootout in a Star Wars movie. I got to be the ungodly accurate Jedi Farm boy, and they got to be the "Elite" broadside missing ST's! (Who taught those guys how to shoot anyhow?!!!)
HALO (PC): MWWAAHAHAHAHHA.....Nate's brother Charles, has affectionately dubbed me "The Pistol Bitch" specifically because of this game. Of all the things that made my year, they actually created a pistol with a SCOPE on the fucker! Headshots all around!
HALO 2 (X-BOX): The game has changed quite a bit since its predecessor set the pace in FPS gaming. Though the original scoped pistol is no longer present (yeah, i cried for a few hours about that one), the plasma pistol has now become one of my favorite weapons. Charge this little puppy up, and you can completely sap away an opponent's shields.
Unfortunately, it appears that the devs snagged the UT2004 fever, as they have replaced the original starting pistol from HALO to a weak little SMG which fires rapidly, but misses about as much as the Assault rilfe from the original, and is just as ineffective against fully charged shields.
That doesn't mean it's completely useless (since with a charged plasma pistol/SMG pair you can have a good combination), but by itself the SMG is severely lacking in stopping power. AND it sounds like a BB rifle with a bad air pump when fired!
Battlefield 2 (PC): Pinpoint accuracy at close and medium ranges, rapid fire will little extra spread, and just damn satisfying to empty a full clip into someone! I especially like the little puffs of grayish powderish substance when i score a hit to the head. (I'm guessing it's blood...but eh....as long as the suckers go down i can accept it.)
The pistol is my fav so far in this game, though it don't do squat to tanks. Believe me about that one. I'm betting i looked kind of comical being the one soldier trying to take out a tank with a Beretta, but in the words of the great American hero, Jack Burton......."What? Never know till you try....."
Chronicles of Riddick (PC): Quite like Deus Ex, you could choose what path to take (albeit without an RPG-like system). One of the most interesting things about this game was the enhanced capability to "hide in the shadows". When hidden the screen would fade out to a kind of bluish haze indicating that no one could see me. This gave me a tremendous advantage, as it enabled me to take out lone guards with my pistol (which was accurate as hell) without even sweating. The Assault rifle and shotgun had much play in firefights, and though the zoom function in the game worked on ALL weapons (about 2x-4x zoom) , I still preferred the Pistol for long distance takedowns. Its semi-auto capability, and high accuracy kept me alive to fight another day. Add in the fact that you get to play as the infamous Richard B. Riddick, and you have a nonstop, headshooting, bone cracking gallery of fun!
Star Wars Galaxies (PC): What? Yes i know it's not actually an FPS, but its something that I've always wanted to get off my chest. Though they had numerous professions to select from, none of them called to me from the cornfields like Pistoleer. Something about a character that actually had an animation of hauling back with a pistol and smacking something right across the head just appealed to me! Though pistoleer suffered many mishaps through its struggling history (NEVER quite as bad as Ranger), it was still a profession that i refused to drop, no matter how much the odds were stacked against it! Oh sure, i couldn't kill as many things as a Swordsman, or a Rifleman, but i looked cool as hell with my blaster laying dead on the ground.
Hakai Youkai, the Master Pistoleer! MWAAHAHAHHA
*flashback waver*
Doom (PC): Oh sure, the chain gun rocked, the BFG9000 kicked major ass (i mean come on! Its called the Big Fucking Gun 9000!), and the rocket launcher made wonderful gibs.....but nothing really mamade me feel like I was punching it out on em like the ole 'Pistole'. That pop pop sound that I'd get every time I pulled the trigger sent little shivers of glee down my spine! (though the shotgun was the favored gun of choice through the entire game, pretty much a standard room sweeper anyhow).
Half-life (PC): Probably THE first game to feature a Glock instead of the standard Beretta (or in the case of WWII games) the 1911. It showed the world the wonder of a gun that can fire underwater, and is much more dependable at killing a "zombie" than crowbar to the head. When I found the Glock on the dead security guard, I suddenly felt MUCH better.
Half-life Counterstrike (PC): Screw being a sniper or an SMG whore, DE all the way! That's Desert Eagle to the unknowing, and uninitiated. El .50 caliber pistole ends the life of the enemy like a Catholic school girl's virginity is ended at a college frat party; violated and very messy.......
Deus Ex (PC): My name is JC Denton.....they call me "Silent Killer". There were many ways to play this game (which was one of the greatest things about it), but of all the ways, i liked vamping up my ole Stealth pistol and popping some headshots through a modified scope.
Most guides I've read say that the stealth pistol isn't really worth the effort, but in all honesty by packing it on with some skills, a bunch of mods, and a steady aim, that little package had some killin power to it!
Almost none of the other weapons allowed a distanced silent takedown (meaning you can kill without alertin patrols, the BEST way to stay alive in that game), and since 10mm ammunition was cheap and plentiful, you'd never run out of ammo! And i DO mean never! I once tried to go dry on a killing spree....random gunnings a whatnot...... and got tired after the first 30 minutes or so.
The stealth pistol's 1 inventory space ensured that i could pack up on some LAM's or other neat goodies without reserve too. Which allowed me to roleplay my character to it's fullest. I personally liked to keep a lot of booze handy, because them strippers started looking mighty fine in my wavering alcohol soaked haze.
Medal of Honor Allied Assault (PC): F3AR MY PISTOL WHIP!!!!! If the pistol came out, the enemy'd start tossing nades...apparently they preferred blowing themselves up instead of getting smacked around BITCH style.
*evil cackle*
I swear my kill count would have been better if those wimps didn't take out their entire team on some occasions! Damn TK'ers stealing the kills from me!
Unreal Tournament (original PC): Dual Enforcers kick ass! gotta love that rush when you see that second Enforcer come up on the screen....OOOOOWEEEEEEEEE!!
UT2004 (PC): They left em out!! curses to em!!! MY PRECIOUS!!!!!
Red Faction (PS2): Pissed the hell out of a lot of buds about this little known gem secret i used VERY successfully in ALL of the games I've played. Almost all the weapons were notoriously inaccurate (as in only 1 out of every 20 bullets would actually hit the center of your aiming reticule). The little trick i found was that with ANY pistol, you could shoot using single taps with short pauses between shots to hit dead center EVERY time.
While my buddies were trying to mow me down with the woefully inaccurate SMG's, i was plinking them off like tin cans on a fence. Most of the games played out like a Stormtrooper shootout in a Star Wars movie. I got to be the ungodly accurate Jedi Farm boy, and they got to be the "Elite" broadside missing ST's! (Who taught those guys how to shoot anyhow?!!!)
HALO (PC): MWWAAHAHAHAHHA.....Nate's brother Charles, has affectionately dubbed me "The Pistol Bitch" specifically because of this game. Of all the things that made my year, they actually created a pistol with a SCOPE on the fucker! Headshots all around!
HALO 2 (X-BOX): The game has changed quite a bit since its predecessor set the pace in FPS gaming. Though the original scoped pistol is no longer present (yeah, i cried for a few hours about that one), the plasma pistol has now become one of my favorite weapons. Charge this little puppy up, and you can completely sap away an opponent's shields.
Unfortunately, it appears that the devs snagged the UT2004 fever, as they have replaced the original starting pistol from HALO to a weak little SMG which fires rapidly, but misses about as much as the Assault rilfe from the original, and is just as ineffective against fully charged shields.
That doesn't mean it's completely useless (since with a charged plasma pistol/SMG pair you can have a good combination), but by itself the SMG is severely lacking in stopping power. AND it sounds like a BB rifle with a bad air pump when fired!
Battlefield 2 (PC): Pinpoint accuracy at close and medium ranges, rapid fire will little extra spread, and just damn satisfying to empty a full clip into someone! I especially like the little puffs of grayish powderish substance when i score a hit to the head. (I'm guessing it's blood...but eh....as long as the suckers go down i can accept it.)
The pistol is my fav so far in this game, though it don't do squat to tanks. Believe me about that one. I'm betting i looked kind of comical being the one soldier trying to take out a tank with a Beretta, but in the words of the great American hero, Jack Burton......."What? Never know till you try....."
Chronicles of Riddick (PC): Quite like Deus Ex, you could choose what path to take (albeit without an RPG-like system). One of the most interesting things about this game was the enhanced capability to "hide in the shadows". When hidden the screen would fade out to a kind of bluish haze indicating that no one could see me. This gave me a tremendous advantage, as it enabled me to take out lone guards with my pistol (which was accurate as hell) without even sweating. The Assault rifle and shotgun had much play in firefights, and though the zoom function in the game worked on ALL weapons (about 2x-4x zoom) , I still preferred the Pistol for long distance takedowns. Its semi-auto capability, and high accuracy kept me alive to fight another day. Add in the fact that you get to play as the infamous Richard B. Riddick, and you have a nonstop, headshooting, bone cracking gallery of fun!
Star Wars Galaxies (PC): What? Yes i know it's not actually an FPS, but its something that I've always wanted to get off my chest. Though they had numerous professions to select from, none of them called to me from the cornfields like Pistoleer. Something about a character that actually had an animation of hauling back with a pistol and smacking something right across the head just appealed to me! Though pistoleer suffered many mishaps through its struggling history (NEVER quite as bad as Ranger), it was still a profession that i refused to drop, no matter how much the odds were stacked against it! Oh sure, i couldn't kill as many things as a Swordsman, or a Rifleman, but i looked cool as hell with my blaster laying dead on the ground.
Hakai Youkai, the Master Pistoleer! MWAAHAHAHHA
posted by Hakai at
9:51 AM
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